


Meeting Again

by bluemadridista



Category: EXO (Band), K-pop
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, But that's why i used the T rating, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Past Relationship(s), a little bit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-23
Updated: 2018-03-23
Packaged: 2019-04-06 17:45:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14062095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluemadridista/pseuds/bluemadridista
Summary: “Maybe the universe thought it was time we finally meet again.”“I owe the universe a thank you then.”





	Meeting Again

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Krisho fic and it's probably unrealistic but I just have a lot of Krisho, ot12 feelings. Please don't judge it too harshly.  
> Note that not all of the opinions are meant to be what Kris and Suho would really feel. I don't know them so I have no idea what they feel. They're also not always my personal opinions. It's just what works for the fic.

Junmyeon had been in Shanghai for a week working on a new movie. It was an exciting new experience and he was always happy to switch gears, but he’d be lying if he said it wasn’t exhausting work.

Acting is always tiresome but acting in a country that is not his own, surrounded by people speaking a language that he has yet to perfect, and giving his lines in that language drained him.

He would never complain. He’d been blessed so much in his life. He’d been giving so many opportunities, once-in-a-lifetime things that most people will never experience.

He couldn’t complain, but after five straight days of long working hours, he could allow himself a little treat.

It was after midnight when he arrived at his new hotel. The fans tracked him down at the last one and his manager opted to move him. He sneaked in the back of this one to avoid being seen. He loved his fans, of course, but they were a lot to deal with at midnight when he’d been up since five, working non-stop, barely eating…

He rubbed the back of his neck that burned and begged for a soak and some rest.

After a drink, he thought. Just one drink, a night cap.

The bar was blessedly empty and dim-lit. Music played low, something classical, he thought. No words, just soft music.

His eyelids drooped, but he shook the sleep away. One drink.

The bartender wasn’t at his post and Junmyeon dragged his eyes across the room. He spotted a man standing beside a booth table in the back corner. There must have been a customer seated there, because the man is speaking. Junmyeon could hear his voice, but not clearly enough to make out what he was saying. The other person wasn’t talking and Junmyeon couldn’t see them for the high back of the booth.

He slid onto a barstool to wait for the bartender to return. He wasn’t in such a hurry that he needed to call for the man.

His neck and back protested. He rubbed both and felt old.

At only twenty-nine, twenty-eight by International standards, he felt far older than his years. A life of non-stop work, go-go-go, choreography, running here and there had taken its toll on his body.

He hung his head and rubbed his neck harder than before, massaging a tight spot.

The bartender appeared without him knowing and startled him. “Sir, can I help you?”

Junmyeon jerked his head upward and the man uttered an apology. “Vodka,” he replied softly so as not to disturb the other customer.

The man dropped two cubes of ice into a cup and carefully poured the clear liquid over it. Junmyeon paid and had just lifted the glass to his mouth when the other customer called out for the bartender.

“Sir, another please!”

The chill that ran down Junmyeon’s spine caused him to nearly drop his glass on the bar. He gripped it tighter.

“One moment!” the bartender called back.

“No problem!”

Junmyeon fumbled his glass as he placed it on the bar. He slid from his stool, leaning forward onto the bar.

“Sir, are you okay?”

The bartender was startled by Junmyeon’s wide eyes and pale face.

Junmyeon nodded and waved him off.

He would recognize that voice anywhere.

It had been four years, but he would know it anywhere. Any time.

“You’re sure, Sir?” The bartender worked on the other man’s drink, but had his eyes glued to Junmyeon.

He nodded and shook his head at the same time. Not at all helpful, but the thoughts racing through his mind prevened helpful thoughts from forming.

“Extra ice this time, please!”

Kris.

It must have been.

It was.

He would know him anywhere.

That voice.

The same voice that used to whisper to him in the night, in the dark, in the bed they shared so many nights.

It had been so long since he’s heard his voice like that. He watched his movies and music videos when he could sneak away from everyone else, but this…

He’d know that voice anywhere.

Junmyeon knocked his own drink back while the man delivered the glass to Kris and requests another when he returns to his post.

The man looked like he might protest but thought better of it and poured the vodka into the glass. He walked off into the back a moment later as if he couldn’t watch Junmyeon drink it. The young man looked a little unnerved. Giving him a second drink wouldn’t be on his conscience.

Junmyeon downed the drink and left the payment and a hefty tip on the bar.

He knew how he must look.

His heart pounded in his ears, blood roaring through his veins.

So foolish. How could Kris still have this heart-pounding effect on him? Why had he always been the one…?

The one, just that. He was always… the one.

Against his better judgment, fueled by two glasses of “liquid courage,” he turned away from the bar. He stared at the high back of the booth for a moment before his legs motivated themselves to move, to walk toward Kris.

When Kris sensed someone at his side, he dug into the bag at his side for his wallet. He assumed it was the bartender. Exhausted from a long flight, it’s quite possible that he forgot a tip or even to pay him for the second drink.

He rifled through bills in his wallet – an odd mixture of US, Canadian, and Chinese bills. He may have even had a pound from his brief stop in London. “Did I forget?”

The words hit Junmyeon. He had no idea what Kris was asking or who he thought he was addressing but isn’t it the most perfect question. The question had been on his mind since Kris left, since the company forced them apart.

How foolish had he been, had they both been? They’re grown men. If they were so in love – they were, he was sure – they wouldn’t have let them do that.

Junmyeon had to think of the others. He had to think of the members, put them first. He couldn’t make waves.

At least that’s what he told himself when the faint smell of Kris on his sheets kept him awake at night, when he stared at the gallery of old photos in his phone – the only folder locked behind a password encryption.

He shook himself out of his thoughts just before Kris looked up and said, “I wonder about that all the time.”

Kris’ hand shook and bills flew into his lap, onto the floor, his wallet with them. His head jerked up and he gaped at Junmyeon, bewildered.

“It can’t be…” he muttered. Of all the people in the world he might have thought he’d run into in this hotel, it would never be…

“Well, it is…” Junmyeon was a disastrous mix of nostalgic, distraught, exhausted, elated, and now angry. He felt the old rage bubbling up inside of him. He wasn’t the only fool. Kris could have done something. He could have stayed… if he loved him. Maybe he never did. That thought comforted him sometimes; destroyed him, others.

Kris could barely speak and when he did, his words sounded sharp, accusatory. “Why are you here?”

Junmyeon picked up the accusatory tone and the anger in him flared. He flexed his hands and just stopped himself from smacking Kris in the face. “You know I came here just for you.”

Kris’ jaw tightened. He remembered that sarcasm that Junmyeon could pull out, like a weapon in his arsenal. It was right up there with the coy smile that killed Kris every time or, the worst, the tears. “I just…” He sighed and set his tone to an even one, knowing he may be at least partially to blame for Junmyeon’s response. Maybe fully to blame. “I just meant that… Where are the others? You’re never without them?”

“I am, actually. I’m filming. Not everything is EXO, as you well know.”

Junmyeon may as well have smacked him. It would have hurt less than that jab. He’d hoped that the others were around. Aside from watching their music videos and a few variety show appearances when he had time alone in one hotel room or another, he hadn’t seen them in years. Guys he had once considered to be family – brothers, children. He hated to admit that he missed them, but he missed them all terribly. He assumed Junmyeon would have at least seven or eight of them with him.

“I…” He wasn’t sure where to go from there. How could he argue with him? He’d allowed SM to bully him. It was his choice to leave, he had to do it, but he let them bully him into silence. He let them keep him from seeing the members, his second family.

“Sir, is this man bothering you?” The bartender appeared beside Junmyeon, alarmed by the state of the two men. Junmyeon still looked crazed, Kris bewildered and covered in fallen money.

“No,” both answered at the same time.

The bartender took a step closer to Kris to show whose side he was on. “Are you quite sure everything is alright, Sir?”

“No,” Kris replied honestly. “But I don’t need assistance, thank you very much.” Kris took one of the bills from his lap and offered it to the man who bowed and politely denied it before whisking himself away quickly.

After an awkward moment, Junmyeon stooped to collect the other fallen bills and Kris’ wallet. When he picked up the wallet from the floor, he stared at the worn black leather, turned it over in his hand. “Is this…?”

“Yes.”

A tear fell from Junmyeon’s eye and dripped onto the wallet. He brushed the wallet first, then his cheek, and took a deep breath in to stave off any other tears.

He’d purchased the wallet for Kris’ birthday. They’d been dating only a few months, but he’d wanted to get something for him, something he’d always carry with him. A watch was well out of his price range. Contrary to popular belief, Junmyeon wasn’t rich. His family was wealthy, but his income from SM wasn’t what it probably should be for someone who worked as hard as he did. Kris had valued the wallet so much, but Junmyeon assumed he’d thrown it out when he left.

“I guess you didn’t forget then.” Junmyeon carefully arranged bills and placed them into his wallet, rubbing the old leather before he handed it up to him.

Kris thanked him and shoved the wallet into his bag. “How could I forget?” he asked. “You really thought…”

“How am I supposed to know?” Junmyeon’s voice raised as he stood up once again. He quickly apologized for that and moved toward the other side of the table. “May I?” He gestured to the booth, starting to sit before Kris even gave him the okay.

“No.”

Junmyeon wobbled on his feet as he awkwardly leaned in to take a seat but abruptly stopped himself. “No?” He stood straight, crossing his arms over his chest to keep from slapping Kris. The desire to do so rose in him again.

But then Kris stood.

Junmyeon looked up at him. Kris’ height had been one of the many physical things about the man that Junmyeon had always loved and secretly envied. He wasn’t really a short man, but Kris was so _tall_. Such an attractive trait for a man. His desires suddenly shifted far away from slapping Kris…

“Let’s go somewhere else. I’d like to talk, if you have the time?”

Junmyeon was practically vibrating with so many feelings racing through him. He played it off with his stupid sense of humor. “What’s a few minutes in the middle of the night between old lovers turned enemies?”

“Junmyeon…” His name was a honeyed sigh on Kris’ lips. Junmyeon squirmed. “We’ve never been enemies. I hope that’s now how you see me.”

“It was…” Junmyeon cleared his throat. “It was a… joke.”

“Ah…” Kris gave a low, gravely chuckle. “You were never very good at that.”

“You always laughed,” Junmyeon rebutted, sounding very much like a petulant child.

“That’s what you do when you love someone.”

Junmyeon wondered if Kris had carefully avoided speaking of their love in the past tense intentionally or if that was just his foolish hope. How could it be that he was still in love with Kris after so many years? Surely, love was supposed to fade after a time. How he’d wished it would so many times. It was such an inconvenient thing, especially in his business, an industry built on the illusion that no one in it ever fell in love with anyone outside their adoring hordes of fans.

“I have a suite. Do you want to come up?” Kris thought immediately how that offer might sound and clarified, “For a talk and a drink, I mean.”

The shorter man’s cheeks tinted pink, but he nodded and followed Kris as he led the way out of the bar.

They both nodded to the concerned barman on the way out.

 

“So, why are you here?” Junmyeon asked. The door was firmly shut behind them and he lingered near it while Kris crossed the room to the little bar situated in the corner. It was larger and more impressive than the mini bar in his room.

“I’ll be filming soon as well.”

“We’re not working on the same film, are we?”

Kris laughed. “Filming begins in a few days for me, so I would think not.”

“I don’t think the company would allow it anyway.”

Kris rolled his eyes as he poured a tiny bottle of vodka into a glass over ice. He handed it over to him. “The company sure has a tight grip on both us, don’t they?”

“Not so much you anymore.”

“You have no idea what I go through with them.” It came out harsher than he had intended and he apologized immediately. “I didn’t mean…”

“No, you’re right. I… don’t know anything about you anymore.” He lowered his eyes and sipped at his drink.

Kris poured himself a whiskey and sat on the couch in the seating area of his suite. “Come have a seat, Jun. Let’s catch up.”

No one called him Jun ever. He hadn’t heard the shortened version of his given name in years. He went to the couch without a word, perching on the end opposite Kris.

Kris folded his leg onto the couch and turned to face his ex, his right arm lying on the back of his couch while the other draped over the leg dangling off the side of the couch. The whiskey in his left hand balanced on his thigh. Junmyeon mirrored him on his end of the couch. “You’ve never forgiven me, have you?”

He had actually intended to ask how things had been going but the serious question came flying from his mouth before he could stop it. Kudos to it for staying bottled up for four years, though.

“No,” Junmyeon answered truthfully. “I imagine you’ve never forgiven me for not fighting for you either.”

Kris shook his head. “I never faulted you for that, Junmyeon. You had a little family to protect, didn’t you?”

“That sounds like an accusation for than a reassurance of forgiveness.”

“It wasn’t. I’m on edge, Jun. Honestly, I never thought I’d see you outside of a screen again.”

“Have you seen me on a screen?”

Kris chewed the inside of his cheek. That was an accidental admission. “Of course, I have.” He tried not to sound disappointed in the fact that Junmyeon apparently hadn’t seen anything he had done.

“You deserved more screen time in Valerian.”

Kris laughed and choked on the sip of whiskey he’d just taken. “Thanks.”

“You should have been Valerian, I probably would have liked the movie more.”

Kris barked with laughter that time. “I couldn’t have been Valerian.” He shook his head.

“And why not? You’re very talented.” Junmyeon slipped back into his old supportive boyfriend role.

“Look at me, Jun. That was a Hollywood movie. I was lucky to get the role at all.”

Junmyeon rolled his eyes. Hollywood and their inability to give decent roles to anyone that wasn’t related to Snow White annoyed him to no end, but now wasn’t the time to climb onto that soap box. “You did well in the role. In the Xander Whatever thing too.”

“XXX: The Return of Xander Cage.”

“That, yes.” He smiled and sipped his vodka.

“So, you’ve been digitally stalking me all these years, then?” Kris arched his brow.

“Don’t flatter yourself. It’s two movies…”

“Hmm… Nothing else?”

“Let’s talk about you. What have you seen of me on the screen?”

“So, how do you enjoy the weather here in Shanghai, Junmyeon?”

“Yeah, yeah, that’s what I thought.” He shook his head, smiling as he sipped from his glass.

Kris just chuckled. “I watch all the EXO things. You guys are doing so well. I’m proud of you. Can I be proud of you? I don’t know. Maybe I don’t have that right anymore.” He shrugged his shoulders. He wasn’t great with feelings all the time and knowing which ones he could or couldn’t have.

“Thank you. We fought really hard to get where we are.”

“Now who is making accusations?”

“I wasn’t!”

Kris leaned his head over on the arm laid on the back of the couch. “Maybe I just hear one because I deserve one.”

“You _think_ you do.”

“Do I not? You said yourself that you haven’t forgiven me.”

“I haven’t forgiven you for leaving _me_ , not the group or the company. I understood that. You had to leave for your health. I never wanted you to suffer. I just haven’t forgiven you for never speaking to me again. If it helps, I haven’t forgiven myself for leaving you either.”

“We were forced by the company, Jun.”

“We’re grown men, Kris! We were grown then. We weren’t children to be bossed around by some company. They don’t own us.”

“Don’t they? I don’t even work for them anymore and they still try to dictate what I do. They still try to control my company in China. They have to clear certain things with SM and I’m not allowed to promote where you’re promoting when you’re promoting. I don’t know how they missed this.”

“I’m leaving in two days. They probably thought you wouldn’t arrive until it was time to film.”

“Do they tell you about changing schedules because I’m scheduled somewhere?”

“No. We probably don’t cross paths much.”

“Maybe not. I’ve only had a few problems crossing paths with Yixing mostly. They always renegotiate the terms of my engagement.”

“That’s not fair.”

“You sound like Chanyeol. Life isn’t fair, Jun. If it was, SM wouldn’t exist in the world.”

Junmyeon grimaced and sipped his drink. He couldn’t disagree but still had a fear of speaking harshly about the company.

“How is Chanyeol?”

“He misses you. He’s fine, I mean.”

“You trying to make me feel guilty? I already do, you don’t have to work at it.”

“No, I’m not trying… I just don’t know how to talk to you.”

“I thought we were doing pretty well.”

“Not really. I feel like I’m sitting on a bed of nails. If I move the wrong way, I’m going to get stabbed.”

“Relax.” He extended the leg folded on the couch and nudged him with his foot.

“Kicking me is supposed to be relaxing?”

“I hardly kicked you. Now you sound like Zitao, such a drama queen. The kids are rubbing off on you.”

“I haven’t seen Zitao in years…”

Kris frowned. “Right, I’m sorry.”

“His leaving wasn’t your fault.”

“I can still be sorry.”

“We’re all sorry, but there’s nothing we can do about it.”

“Someone told me that we’re grown men and always have been…”

Junmyeon finished his drink off and huffed. “He was probably an idiot.”

“I always thought so. He gets by on his looks.”

The pink tint that invaded Junmyeon’s entire face made Kris laugh. He threw back the last little gulp of his drink and stood up. “You want another?”

“That’s my third.”

“That wasn’t my question…”

“I have an early wake-up call tomorrow.”

“Still wasn’t my question.”

“You’re a bad influence.”

“Always was.”

“Right, but you got by on your looks.”

“With you anyway.”

Junmyeon handed him the glass and then swiveled on the couch to watch him cross the room to the bar. He wanted to touch him, hold him like they used to do when it was only the two of them. He’d even settle for holding him the way they used to do when they were in front of thousands of screaming fans.

“Fan service,” they called it. More like, “we can express our feelings for each other and pretend that it’s fan service so you’ll accept us.”

“Why are you staring at me?”

Junmyeon jumped. Kris wasn’t facing him. Did he have eyes in back of his head? “I wasn’t…”

“I could feel it.”

“Liar.”

“You’re the one lying!”

Kris crossed back to the couch, handed off the drink, and resumed his former position though slightly more slumped. He was getting tired and a little tipsy.

“I haven’t seen you in years. Am I not allowed to stare a little?”

“I guess. I do look really good these days.”

“What’s new?”

Kris laughed. “No one has ever been as good for my ego as you, Junmyeon.”

“Your ego doesn’t need any help, but you’re welcome.”

“Hey… I’m not _that_ bad.”

Junmyeon sipped his drink and let his head slump over onto his arm and the back of the couch. “So, what’s new, really? All I know of you from the past four years is your movies and music.”

“Ah, the music too. Did you like it?”

“’Course.”

“There’s not much else to tell, honestly. I don’t really have a life outside acting and making music. I got a new dog, but gave to my mom. I couldn’t take care of it. Gone too much.”

Junmyeon hummed in the hope that Kris would touch on the one subject that he really wanted to know about but didn’t didn’t know how to approach: his dating life.

“What about you?”

He let out a heavy sigh. Kris was closing the personal life subject, apparently.

“Was my answer not satisfactory enough?”

He shook his head to Kris’ question and sipped at his drink. His eyelids grew heavy. He was tired and the alcohol made it worse.

“Junmyeon, we’re grown men, remember? If you want to know if I’ve been seeing someone else, just ask.”

“I wouldn’t ask like that even if I did want to know.”

“So, you don’t want to know then?”

“It’s not really my business, is it?”

“Not my question.”

“Well, don’t you want to know if I’ve been seeing anyone?”

“Still not part of my question.”

“Stop.”

Kris laughed. “Of course I’d like to know, but I assume you have. I heard you were seeing… I don’t know one of the SNSD girls or Red Velvet. Something.”

“Kris, I’m gay.”

“Never stopped anyone before.”

“I haven’t dated anyone since you left. People tend to find gaping holes in someone’s chest a little alarming.”

“Are you sure you haven’t been in contact with Zitao? You’re being so dramatic. Oh… Sehun!”

“Shut up. Don’t talk about my kids like that.”

“You know your babies are drama queens.”

“But I love them anyway.”

“And…” He cut off and took a drink rather than finish his sentence.

“And, what? You never answered my question.”

“I answered your question. Both of them, actually.”

“Well, answer the one I didn’t ask and the and one.” Alcohol was making him whiny.

“I don’t even understand what you just said.” He laughed. “I forgot how incoherent and whiny you get when you’re drunk.”

“I am not drunk.”

“You’re well on your way.”

“You’re the only plying me with alcohol.”

“I’m hardly plying you.”

“You would though.”

He snorted. “Shut up, Junmyeon. To answer your non-question: I’m not seeing anyone. I briefly dating someone while I was working on a movie last year but it was more for publicity than anything else.”

“I heard about that. You didn’t really like her?”

“No. I mean, I liked her, but not like that. She was nice.”

“Really?”

“Yes, very nice. Why? Do you want her number?”

“Kris… I mean, really as in, you haven’t dated anyone since you left.”

“No. I haven’t wanted to either, Jun. You weren’t the only one with a gaping hole in their chest, as you so eloquently put it.”

“Do you ever miss me?”

“No.”

“Liar.”

“Why do you ask if you know the answer?”

“Because…” He lifted his head. “I’ve waited four years to hear you say it!”

Kris sighed. He placed his drink on the table in front of the couch and reached out to take the one in Junmyeon’s hand. He put with his and pulled the other man to his feet.

Junmyeon was not prepared to be touched by Kris at all, let alone grabbed by the hands and hoisted off the couch. He stumbled and almost fell onto him.

“You are so drunk,” Kris whispered, chuckling softly.

“I am not! Why did you grab me and pull me and…” He jerked his hands away from Kris who took a step back.

“Okay, I’m sorry. I won’t touch you. I… Never mind. You want to finish your drink and go?”

Junmyeon’s bottom lip jutted out like a pouting child. “You want me to go?”

“Not really but you’re yelling at me, so I thought…”

“I just want you to hug me and tell me that you miss me. I’ve been missing you all these years, all these months and days and… I just want to hear you say it.”

“I was going to before you freaked out.”

“Well, just shut up and do it already.”

“How can I shut up and tell you that I miss you at the same time.”

“Kris, I swear I’m going to leave if you don’t quit being stupid.”

“Don’t threaten me with leaving, Jun.” He grabbed his wrist and pulled him in for a hug. “I miss you, okay?” He draped his long arms around him. “I miss you every day.”

Junmyeon could feel his eyes start to burn but he gulped, forcing back any tears that might try to come. He wasn’t going to be a pathetic ex-boyfriend and cry on Kris.

Then, Kris sniffed.

Junmyeon tried to pull back to look at him, but Kris held him tighter. “Don’t look at me,” he whispered, sniffing again.

“Are you…”

“Shut up, Jun.”

Junmyeon finally brought his arms up to hug Kris. He still wouldn’t let himself cry but the tears begged to come and his eyes burned.

“Why did you have to be here?”

“Maybe the universe thought it was time we finally meet again.”

“I owe the universe a thank you then.”

Junmyeon nodded, the side of his face pressed against Kris’ chest. “Can I look at you yet?”

“Ah, why do you want to look at me?”

“I’ve waited four years. Didn’t we discuss this already?”

Kris pulled away but turned around to brush tears away from his face before he looked at Junmyeon.

“I have seen you cry before, you know?”

“You’re one to talk, you know? You’re not crying.”

“Maybe I don’t want to cry.”

“You don’t miss me that much?”

He smacked him lightly on the cheek. “Not even funny. I just don’t want you to see me cry after all this time. I want to look good. I want you to regret what you left behind.” Junmyeon did a stupid pose that was meant to be sexy but was not even close to the same realm.

“You could be completely covered from head-to-toe and I’d still regret what I left behind, Jun. I regret every day not being brave enough to stand up to SM. You don’t have to remind me, trust me. You don’t know how many days I think about what we could be now. Good grief. I’m almost thirty years old. I’ve wasted so much of my life.”

“You have not. You’re successful.”

“So what? I love what I do, but not as much as I love you.”

“Yeah, well…” He cut off when it occurred to him that Kris had used the present tense… “Love.”

“Yes, love. It’s more important than your job or money. You can’t tell me that you don’t feel the same way.”

“I’m sorry feel the same way about what?”

“Love, you fool. Are you even listening to me?”

“Yes, but do I feel the same way about love being more important than money or am I in love with you?”

“No. What?”

“You said that you love me.”

“I didn’t… I said…”

“You said that you love what you do, but not as much as you love me. Not loved. Love.”

“Oh, shut up. It’s been four years. You think I still love you?” Kris crossed his arms over his chest.

Junmyeon finally cried. Silently and with dignity, but the tears rolled hot down his cheeks.

“Why are you crying?” Kris fidgeted nervously.

Junmyeon said nothing, just backed away from him and walked quickly toward the door.

“Jun, wait!”

“I have an early wake-up call.” His dignified façade crumbled when a sob hiccupped out of his throat.

“Jun, please. I didn’t mean it! I mean… I… You can’t still love me, right?” Kris crossed the room in three giant strides and grabbed his arm just when he’d reached the door.

He turned and raised the other to smack him on the same cheek he’d smacked earlier, but a great deal harder this go around.

“Ow, Jun…”

“Yes, I still love you. Now, let me go. Leave me to be the pathetic idiot that still isn’t over you. Like you’re some great prize to begin with.” He huffed.

“We both know I am,” Kris said, rubbing his stinging in cheek with the hand not wrapped around Junmyeon’s wrist.

When Junmyeon raised his hand to smack Kris again, Kris caught his wrist and pressed it to the door above his head. The other wrist was pinned to the door by Junmyeon’s side. He brought it up beside the other.

“I didn’t mean it.”

“Good, because we both know you’re _not_.”

“Not that. I meant that. I didn’t mean it when I said I didn’t love you, Stupid. I just…”

“Don’t call me stupid.”

“I’m sorry. But I felt stupid, you know? I felt foolish and I thought you were calling me out for being an idiot and pining for you all these years. I wasn’t going to admit to that.”

“So, what?”

“So, what do you mean so, what?”

“Do you love me or not?”

“I thought we covered that with the ‘pining for you all these years’ thing?”

“It’s been four years, Kris…”

“Oh, this is the ‘I just want to hear you say it’ bit.”

“You’re really slow, Kris…”

“Well, now I might change my mind.”

Junmyeon struggled against him, but Kris tightened his grip. “I’m not letting you smack me again. This face has got to look good for filming, please.”

“I could kick you, if you prefer.”

“I’d prefer a different four-letter-word that starts with K.”

“Kill? That’s a little harsh, but I’ll think about it if you don’t let go of my wrists.”

Kris laughed. “Okay, that was pretty good, I’ll admit. Especially since we’re not even speaking English and yours was fairly terrible the last time I heard you speak.”

“It’s been a while. I’ve learned a few things.”

“How to kill a man being one of them.”

“You’ll find out if you don’t let go of my wrists. When did you get so strong? It’s so hot and annoying at the same time.”

“That’s what I always thought about you, my love.”

Junmyeon wiggled and kicked him in the shin.

“Ouch! Don’t do that.”

“You just called me annoying.”

“You called me annoying! I didn’t kick you in the shin!”

“I called your muscles hot and annoying. There’s a difference.”

“Fine. Can you shut up for a second? I need to tell you something.”

“I don’t want to hear it until you let go of my wrists.”

“Are you going to smack me again?”

“Depends.”

He lowered his wrists but guarded his face.

“I’m not going to smack you. Say what you want to say.”

“Well, it doesn’t feel like the right moment now.” He huffed and crossed his arms over his chest.

“The right moment was you holding my arms over my head?”

“I seem to recall a pretty nice _moment_ or two that we had back in the day that started with you like that.”

Junmyeon blushed. “Don’t talk about that…”

“Sorry… Don’t blush.” He chuckled softly and reached out to brush his thumb over Junmyeon’s pink cheek. “I love you, Jun, okay? Joking aside and, I do still love you, but honestly, what good does it do either one of us?”

Tears trickled from the corners of Junmyeon’s eyes. “It’s nice to know I’m not the only one feeling it.”

“But it won’t change anything, will it?”

“It changes everything for me. I mean, I’ve always felt like a pathetic mess, still loving you after all this time, still thinking of the time we spent together, wishing you’d come back or call or something.”

“I did call once, actually. Two years ago. I had a particularly bad night and a few drinks and I called the number I still had for you in my phone. It wasn’t in service.”

Junmyeon’s face fell. “I changed the number. A fan got it and wouldn’t stop calling. You called?”

He nodded. “I’m glad I didn’t get you. You wouldn’t have wanted to hear from me like that. And it really wouldn’t have been good. I like the universe’s plan much better, though I don’t understand where it thinks we’ll go from here.”

“Kris, we can only put so much on the universe. It brought us back together. I think it’s up to us to figure out where we go from here.”

Kris ran his fingers through his hair, looking down. “I don’t want to lose contact with you again, that’s all I know. I don’t know how we could possibly make anything work, but I don’t want to lose contact. I want to be able to call you and see your face now and then.”

“Just now and then.”

“I would have said every day if I thought that was realistic. I’ll take whatever I can get.”

“I’d give you whatever you asked for if I thought I could realistically give it to you.”

“Can you realistically give a kiss if I ask for it?”

Junmyeon melted back against the door. He didn’t really understand how this could be his reality after all this time. How could he really be about to experience what it was like to kiss Kris again?

“Okay, I’m just going to kiss you. Don’t slap me.”

“Oh, yeah, sorry I…”

Kris cut him off with a soft kiss on his lips. His lips felt so familiar even after all the time apart. He brought his arms up to hands to rest on Kris’ hips.

The soft kiss quickly took a turn. Junmyeon gripped his lips. Kris’ hands were in his hair.

It was like the time had been mere days rather than years.

Then Kris broke away.

“I’m sorry,” he panted.

“For what?”

“That…”

“Kissing me?”

“Like that. It was…”

“It felt like old times…”

“It did.” He brushed his thumb over his cheek. “I don’t think we should do it again until we figure out what we’re going to do. Where we go from here.”

“I think the only place we should be going right now is to bed.”

“Junmyeon!”

“Not like that!” He slapped Kris’ arm. “We need to sleep. It’s late. Can we discuss this tomorrow?”

Kris smirked and kissed his cheek, close to his mouth. “Yes. I’ll give you my number. Text me when you’re free.”

Junmyeon left his room five minutes later with another long kiss and Kris’ new number in his phone. His heart pounded as he took the elevator down two floors to his room. He knew that tomorrow they would talk. They would finally talk through everything, all the things from the past that had plagued them. They would talk it out and plan for the future. Everything would be different, he was sure of that. He would have Kris again, one way or another.

His biggest concern then would be… how to tell the others.

He couldn’t worry about that, he told himself as he settled into bed. He had to let himself be happy and worry-free.

He had Kris.

His phone buzzed on the bedside table just as his eyes were closing. There was a text from Kris when he unlocked it.

_I love you._

And a moment later:

_Feels good to be able to say that again._

_I’m so glad you’re here, Jun._

The worries melted away as his fingers ran over the keyboard to reply.

_I love you too._

_Now get some sleep. I’ll still be here tomorrow._

Just as he was about to put his phone back on the table and roll over to sleep, another text came through.

_Me too. I don’t know what the future will bring, but I’ll never lose contact with you again._

_I’ll hold you to that._

_Now go to sleep._

_See you soon._

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed this, please leave a comment. It would be very helpful especially since this is a pairing I have never written before! Thank you to everyone who reads, leaves kudos, and comments. You are all appreciated so much!! <333


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